And I wonder as I lay here, in this sleepless field of dreams..

HELLO!

Somehow you've stumbled upon my blog, scraping the ends of the internet for something interesting.

Instead you found this.
I hope I don't put you to sleep.


Stories of fiction and fact lie dormant in this digital journal. Anything labelled with fiction junction is just that: fiction.

STORIES

» fiction junction. [all stories are sorted by this tag]
» refraction.
» love's weight.
» Viktor's Girls. [an ongoing collection]


do you think of me when I think of you

» Rachel Waa.
» xkcd.
» questionable content.
» the awesomer.
» not always right.
» stumble upon.
» Lore Olympus.

as the nighttime slowly sings...?

» chih.
» kaylyn.
» kitty.
» j comeau of A Softer World.


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“if only you could see”
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They watched their footfalls.
Jan 29, 2008 || 9:50 PM || comment?

The morning was breezy, and I was running late. If it weren't for all the things I carried, I probably would have ran. I made heavy footsteps, carelessly, into the puddles of water around me. My pants were too long, but I was too short, and the khaki liked to soak in the water. I cursed under my breath as the cold was not something I appreciated. I adjusted my bag to a more comfortable positing, and from the corner of my eye I noticed two people. They were boy and girl, or rather, brother and sister. They resembled each other, both wearing glasses, and bright track jackets. But more than anything, they kept their faces to the ground. It didn't matter if they couldn't see what was going on in front of them, because they relied on their feet to bring them the right path. I imagined they saw some shadow of their footfalls before even taking the next step. They worked carefully, yet effortlessly, to ensure they took the right path. The car pulling out stopped just in time for them, and neither of them batted an eye at this. I couldn't imagine watching my feet all the time, to rely on them to take me to the right place. I always figured if I didn't do something to aide the process, it would never happen.

But they made it to school, just as I had. And everything they did worked out just as well.

Later that day, I tried the same thing, watching my feet as they took me the familiar path, through the gate, under the stairs. Around the circle, and out of the maze. I ran into a few people. I nearly tripped three times. And I made it back safely. But this time, my pants weren't nearly as wet.

Abstract Artist.
Jan 28, 2008 || 9:58 PM || comment?

She blew life into the tulips. As she whispered to each one, the buds unfolded, slow and dramatic. She almost seemed like one of them- beautiful, whimsical. And as she set one foot in front of the other, she seemed to move seamlessly, like water pouring from a pitcher. I wondered why she would not heal the trees. Their dying branches and dried out leaves- surely she could summon new life. But she would only speak to the tulips. I soon realized the illusion- her words weren't lasting. She only spoke simply to the flowers, but by the end of the day they closed again. For her, it would be impossible to give life to the trees, whose roots reached deeply into the earth, to stay there for years and years to come.

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Fuck the redlight.
Jan 20, 2008 || 7:57 PM || comment?

Fuck the redlight. I wish I could keep driving into the distance, I wish the road would never end and I could pass up the airport and not have to say goodbye. Her favorite song was playing. But it was my favorite because it was her favorite. She didn't sing well, but she didn't care and neither did I. She simply sang and it made the most beautiful noise I would ever hear or care to hear. The airport was getting ever closer with each revolution of the tires, and I tried shoving thoughts into my head as long as they didn't make me go back to the only truth: she would be leaving soon. What was the acceleration of my feet as I ran so many miles in so few minutes? Could you calculate the velocity of my heart beating the closer we became to each others lips? It was foolish to try and mask my thoughts so I emptied my head and just listened to her voice some more. Her words didn't make much sense but they were hers.

And there was the redlight.

I waited for the longest minute of my life for the light to change from foreboding red to telling green, which soon became jealousy. Jealous that the flight attendant would see her and I wouldn't. Please buckle your seat belt as we prepare for take off. Please turn off all electronics. And who would be sitting next to her? What chance of conversation would they strike up, and in that time she would forget about me?

A warm touch brought me back to my senses, and she was looking into my eyes a strange and sad look. It wasn't until too late did I realize she wasn't sad about leaving but rather looking in horror at the headlights heading toward us in the middle of intersection. The metal curled with an agonizing shriek; or maybe that was her screaming. The shattered glass was flying around like confetti at a child's party yet it stuck all the same to our faces. I could hardly move to look at her, but she wasn't conscious. And from my inverted position, my fuzzy vision, I could see a green light switching to red.

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What happens in three minutes?
Jan 16, 2008 || 2:58 PM || comment?

A new couple. An old one going their separate ways. The birth of a boy or girl, while in the room next to yours, a stillborn. These things are happening all at once. While you might be laughing at a joke, someone you don't know is alone and all they really need is a good laugh. On your way to someone's birthday party is a funeral procession and all you can think is, "When will it be over?"

2:57 to 3:00, these things happen in just three minutes.

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They were laughing. (Chalk it up to being young.)
Jan 15, 2008 || 5:08 PM || comment?

Call me weird, but I like to dine in restaurants by myself sometimes. However, I often find myself observing the people around me while I eat my food, much like watching different stories unfolding at the same time. At the table in front of mine were three women. Three women, and one what many would say, good looking man. They were all dressed somewhat nicely, maybe they all worked in some multistory office building. I imagined he was the president, and the three women were his assistants on some level. The brunette on his left was his personal assistant. She made sure he had fresh coffee in his room each morning, as well as that extra perk. The blonde on his right cleaned his office every afternoon so there would be no messes when that meeting in the morning rolled around. Someone must have forgotten to tell her about the stains on the couch. And the redhead. I could only see her back, but of the three she was the most beautiful. Even though the brunette and blonde sat next to him on either side, she was his prized treasure. And all she did was transfer his calls. They were laughing at some joke, the brunette and the blonde, while he shared in some special moment with the redhead, simply looking at each other and smiling, knowing their single truth.

Diagonal from me sat a couple, young, possibly in their twenties. The restaurant I chose for tonight was upscale, so it wasn't out of the ordinary to see couples, or to see anyone dressed nicely for the occasion. What she didn't know was behind him he held a small velvet box. His nervousness showed as he kept turning the box in his hands behind the chair. Would he have the courage to ask for her hand? I secretly rooted him on as I ate my asparagus. To my left, also diagonal, was a girl eating by herself. Her hair was jet black, and a bit past her shoulders. She too watched the couple across the way; she seemed a bit envious. I wondered if it were possible she was like myself, eating alone in the restaurant, but watching those around her like an interactive play. She returned her gaze to her plate, which was full of green leaves, probably a salad. With her fork, she stabbed it a few times, then lifted it a little below eye level, turning the fork around, examining each leaf. Then her gaze lifted above the green to catch my own line of sight. I'd never been caught before, so I felt much like a deer caught in the headlights. I simply stared back at her. Despite the distance, I could tell her eyes weren't the usually shade of brown. I imagined some captivating shade of green, but maybe that was because of the lettuce mostly covering her face. She seemed easy going, and maybe the kind of person that would read in the park. In her spare time, she got something to drink at the café across the street and would get engaged in some meaningful conversation. You would think by seeing her in the park she was some introvert who preferred sunlight and printed letters, but sparking a conversation brought out her soul. She was only dying for some conversation with the guy putting on a performance on that Sunday afternoon, or with the dog walker who took the time to get in your way, without actually desiring to be part of that moment in your life.

I blinked out of my daydream to see the green eyed girl was gone. Her plate was only half empty. Her glass of water was barely touched. I probably stared at her long enough to make her leave. I looked back down at my plate, and sadly there was no more asparagus. But there was one napkin more than before. I picked it up; it was too hard to read the small curly letters written on it. I never thought my people watching would pay off to anything positive, then again, I would have to chalk this one up to luck. In cursive, there was written, "Less staring. More talking." Turning the napkin over would reveal seven digits. And all I could think is where she got the pen.

__________________________________________

I just noticed that the past couple of posts have been stories or just generally uninteresting bits of nothing. But, midterms have just passed. And I passed all of them. I've been having a real bad time with my Calculus class, but as it turns out, I made an 84. Even though it isn't an awesome grade, compared to my usual efforts, this was REALLY good. We're just now starting integrals, which is, we're going backwards now, not really un-learning, but just doing everything backwards now to cause all sorts of new problems and I'm going into this with a much better attitude, and more discipline than my first half. I want to show my teacher that I really want to try despite my lack of effort first semester. I made As for both of my Chemistry midterms, and I was really happy about that too. So far I'm doing well with my no-soda thing, which is not something I would have thought I could do last year. Sure it's only day 15, but that's like half a month. So I'm pretty much giving up sodas for good, and don't really plan on touching one after like some kind of milestone. Besides, it's really not that bad...just kind of bland drinking water most of the time.

Yesterday when I was at a stoplight, and I was watching the traffic passing by, I was noticing how the cars were just going, and I was thinking about if a person would just stand in the middle, where the cars from the left and the right don't really pass because those are turning lanes. And in the middle of all that commotion would be this one person. Everyone would notice. Sometimes I feel like I want to make an impact like that. Today we got an assignment in our physics class where we pretty much have to teach a part of the new chapter. And I was thinking how I once thought how neat it would be to get to do something like that, and now that we really have to...it seems different, certainly not the way I planned it. But I would like to be able to have someone say to me, "you know that really stuck in my head and I really understand what you just said." It would be funny because maybe I did a better job than our actual teacher. But we have to do a demonstration of our concept, solve the problems in that section, write a podcast, which is basically an mp3 file which I guess will be something like a lecture maybe? I'm not sure. I just hope we do well enough, because I don't want it to happen where it wasn't done well enough, and it'll pretty much be "oh well I didn't get any of those questions right," and there'd be some fingers pointing. But oh well. I guess we'll just see what happens...

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I don't know why, but your love could make these things better. (The Ghost of a Memory.)
Jan 8, 2008 || 9:51 PM || comment?

Today, as I was walking my usual path from class to class, I happened upon the strangest sight. Something so stark and unusual I had to take a second look. A girl. She wore a jacket that hung off her frame. Her black hair was past her shoulders, and somewhat stringy. In her left hand a book swung back and forth. Surely I would have noticed this ghost of a girl before. I looked around, and I saw the usual crowd. The couple making out under the stairs. The smoker flicking away the last of his dying cigarette. The enthusiastic band nerds. Those people never stood out, never made me go out of my way to think of them as something better than mere scenery. But this girl was different. She had a quick pace, so I had to walk even faster to keep up with her while at the same time keeping a distance so she wouldn't figure that I was following her. As I watched her, and the people around, they didn't seem to notice her. Several times she narrowly made her way through the crowd unharmed. Why didn't anyone notice her? I shoved through the same people she avoided to try and keep sight of her. Then she turned. And two green eyes locked with mine and I froze. Stopping in the middle of this traffic was never good; several people ran into me, and muttered curses as they passed. I wondered if she was really looking at me or not, so I chanced a glance behind myself, and it was nothing special. The backs of those passing by, indistinguishable from one another. When I turned back around, she was gone. I continued, hoping to catch sight of her again, maybe a trace of where she went. Nothing. I sighed, let down by my own foolishness. The bell rang, which brought me back to my senses. I had to run to class so I wouldn't be even later than I already was. I took my seat in class, opened my binder, and stared at the sketch on the first page. A vague figure with stark eyes, staring back at me.

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I don't know who you are, but I caught a sight of you.
Jan 2, 2008 || 8:35 PM || comment?

So it's pretty typical to write of new years and resolutions no doubt to follow. And so my new years resolution is actually something I've been keeping to so far. XD Even thought it's only the third day, I started a little early and probably drank some soda only once or twice. The only thing I really miss about not drinking sodas (and good wholesome corn syrup) is flavor. Water all the time is...well it's boring. XD But I'm sure my body will say thank you (: Because I used to drink at least one soda a day, and that's not good :/

Another thing to bring in the new year is getting my license finally. It's pretty cool being able to drive and whatnot. It's fun to have people in the car and drive somewhere when I feel like it...I dunno though. I guess it doesn't feel like much...

Midterms are coming up soon. Blah. But two things to look forward to: Math tournament, and Chem expo. (: Two things you wouldn't normally do for fun but...I guess I'm not so normal. :P

The weather is too cold. My jacket isn't thick enough and my pants barely keep me warm. Tomorrow I'm going to wear gloves and I wish I had a nice scarf. Oh well...friday is already here and that's all I care about.